A Park Avenue Story

New York has, for my money (or pesos), the best live theatre in the states. It also boasts some really odd fare every so often (or every day, really). And if you have some money and time on your hands, anyone can stage a show. But will an audience actually come and see your show? In the case of Cindy Adams, the strikingly unfunny gossip columnist for "The Daily News" here in NY, the answer (I hope) will be a resounding "no."

Here's details of her upcoming one woman show (taken from playbill.com) about her show called Only in New York, named after her "famous" saying she stole from about seventy different media outlets that thought if it before her.

New York Post gossip columnist Cindy Adams will debut her one-woman show, Only in New York, Sept. 29-Oct. 2.

The four benefit performances will be held in the living room of Adams' Park Avenue apartment, and proceeds will benefit The American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals (ASPCA), one of Adams' favorite charities and one that she serves as a board member.

Each 7:30 PM performance will seat 50 and will include a post-show question-and-answer session.

Only in New York, according to press notes, will take "audiences through [Adams'] unique and almost-unbelievable journey to become the media's authority figure on all of the celebrity news, gossip, scandals, interviews and scoops that the public can't get enough of. Until now, you only think you've heard everything there is to hear from show biz's most well-connected columnist, but Only in New York will reveal things about your favorite celebrities that have always been kept a secret."

The performance also includes a pre-show tour of Adams' nine-room Park Avenue penthouse.

How weird is that? Not only is her show guaranteed to be lamer than "Lestat" the musical, but she's putting it up in her own living room? 50 people hanging out in her living room while she talks? Not even on a stage. Is there an intermission? If I get up to go to the bathroom, or bolt for the door, will the show stop? Will you say something "oh so witty?" And mostly, will you be offended at the deafening silence each time you tell a "joke?" Watch out for those tumble weeds! And wow! You get a pre-show tour of her nine room Park Avenue Penthouse that you could never, ever afford! WOW! And all for the comfy, nifty price tag of $250 a ticket. Yup, you read that right: $250 a pop. Now I know that it says proceeds go to "ASPCA," but read the fine print here. It says "proceeds" not "all proceeds" or even a specific amount of "proceeds." I'd bet, at most, 5% of the ticket sales will go to "ASPCA." The rest will go to Botox. I don't mean to be cynical here (okay, maybe I do) but is there any real reason for this show? "...the media's authority figure on all celebrity news...?" REALLY?! You write for the NEW YORK POST, The National Enquirer of Newspapers for God's sake! A monkey could write a column for your paper. Call it "EEeehhhh, eeehhhhh EEHH!" and I guarantee it'll hold more laughs and less shit than one of your so called "humorous" anecdotes does. Oh, shitty one person shows. Only in New York Kids, Only in New York... (Wait, I've heard that somewhere before...)

(Cindy Adams, along with her husband Muffy Adams, pictured above)

Just three unrelated things is all...

So, I tend to do about fourteen projects at a time. Being insane actually keeps me sane. For instance, I've been shooting small cameo parts in two films (Step Up 3D & Going the Distance), shot a pilot for HBO (Boardwalk Empire), in pre-production for my film Avenue A (which I'm directing), preparing the script for my Romeo & Juliet adaptation, blocking out a new musical I'm writing, and in rehearsals for a swell new show. I love my life. The show I'm rocking out, 1969 style, to is in the new NY Fringe Festival this year. Willy Nilly! is a rollicking psychedelic musical about Charles Manson and his crazy ass killings, only a few names are changed (strictly for the author's amusement).

It's very funny, with a great score by Trav SD, and an awesome ensemble that I'm proud to be a part of. I play many different "Monty Pyton" type parts, including Hippies, a certain Horror Director, a certain "Queen," a hitchhiker, and a few other surprises. We've already been called "this years breakout hit" and we haven't even opened yet! It's exciting to be a part of something exciting (did I actually just write that sentence? Yeah, I did...). And we just might be doing something really cool this coming Wednesday to promote the show... I'll keep ya updated...



PIMPING MY FRIEND ALERT: My good friend Kiirsten (seen here about to hand scissor someone in the face) is an actress. She's also a singer. And in a band. And her band sorta rocks. So you should go vote for her band, "Hip Like (Blank)." They're in a contest. Help her win it by going here. And if you don't vote, well then, the terrorists really have won...

And if by some chance you happen to be enjoying your day and a giant Bollywood number happens in front of you, chances are you're where I was today.


And it was quite entertaining. Oh, Bollywood. You and your dancin'...

Look at that Chris Kattan go! Who knew he was still making movies? Who knew he was even still alive?! Bollywood did, that's who. Bollywood did...

"Funny People" Movie Review

Movies about Comedians usually bring mixed results. The King of Comedy, with Robert DeNiro and Jerry Lewis, is a great example of a movie about comedians done right. Punchline, with Tom Hanks and Sally Field, is not. By finding the right tone to tell a truthful and honest tale of a comedians life, you have to be willing to embrace the drama along with the funny. To have it feel real and not just a story about people who are rich and famous. Who just get to do pretty much anything they want because they're rich and famous and never have any real consequences (I'm looking at you Entourage). Funny People attempts this bold task of showing you rich people with problems and makes it work, makes it "real."

Adam Sandler stars as George Simmons, an actor who sold out by making really terrible Waynes-Brothers esque movies. But the gamble paid off, because he's one of the biggest comic stars in the world. Unfortunately, his life is about to take quite a turn, as he's given news of a rare disease that may kill him. Seth Rogen plays Ira Wright, a young man wanting to be a comedian but has to work all day at a grocery store deli while his two best friends (Jonah Hill & Jason Schwartzman in two very funny smaller roles) have much more success than he does, in varying degrees. One night Simmons sees Ira perform and decides to hire him to write jokes and be his personal assistant.

And so the moves moves forward, not in a montage like rush, but with precision and grace, showing us absolutely everything that is going on with their newly found relationship/sudo friendship. Sandler is great here, just as good as he was in Paul Thomas Anderson's Punch Drunk Love & James L. Brooks' underrated Spanglish. He shows a very tender side, alongside a very abrasive one as well and makes you believe that this man is struggling inside and out (even with his fortunes) and that this disease may be finally opening up his eyes. Rogen also turns in a sharp performance here and you don't question once why he would stay around with this guy, because you would too. Leslie Mann turns the "last act" role of the girl who got away into someone very relatable and, dare I say it again, real. Also, watch out for Aubrey Plaza as the girl of Rogen's dreams, or at least, the girl of his desires, and Eric Bana proves that he can indeed do comedy, and he does it well. There's more, much more (I mean, it's 150 minutes long) to the story, but won't tell you much more in fear of giving away too much of the plot (and I advise you not to watch the original trailer either if you don't want much of the story told to you). Yes, it's a tad long. But it works. Judd Apatow's sweet, personal film is a wonderful meditation on life, death, love, the one who got away, and everyday success and dreams. Again, Apatow shows that he's a master of telling a grown up story with heart and ranchy language. Which is what most of our lives is: a few swear words here, a little heart there, a few more swear words...a few more...a few....). Let Sandler and company entertain you here, make you laugh, make you think, and, thank God, make you feel. - B+